Monday, January 14, 2008

Sigmar and Soren!

After the latest post, this office has determined that such steamy romance is quite as damaging as overt violence. We were shocked - shocked - to realize quite how explicit the previous story sponsored by this office had become, and therefore disavow further such works. Our next story will eschew all such moral corruptions, and is instead a story of two little tykes, and their misadventures.

Sigmar and Soren wandered deep inside the abandoned mansion. "I wonder why it was abandoned?" Sigmar wondered.

"Maybe it was pirates! Or ninja!" Soren suggested with youthful enthusiasm.

"Oh, silly Soren," Sigmar scolded. "That's impossible!"

Then he pointed. "Look there - maybe that box has treasure!"

Sigmar and Soren examined the box carefully. It was made of wood, and had six sides. That's as far as Sigmar got before Soren wrenched the box away from him. With a chortle of glee, Soren popped the latch on the box, even as Sigmar reached to pull it away.

A dart whizzed out of the box. It barely missed Soren; had Sigmar not tipped the box back as he did, it would have hit him. Sigmar examined it - "Poisoned!" he declared. "Soren, you need to be more careful!"

Soren examined the inside of the box, ignoring Sigmar. "Look!" he said, waving something in the air. "A shiny gold coin!"

Sigmar sighed, and together they continued deeper into the mansion.

As they walked, Soren toyed with his coin, rubbing it and staring at it intently. "It's really nice," he said.

"Yes, I suppose it is," Sigmar agreed.

"Maybe it's pirate booty, brought from the high seas to hide in this mansion!" Soren exclaimed.

"Oh, silly Soren," Sigmar sighed. "That's impossible!"

Then he froze. "Wait, Soren," he said. "Look at that chandelier."

"What about it, Sigmar?" asked Soren, craning his head.

"It looks really precarious," said Sigmar. "If we aren't careful, it might fall on us. "

"Wow, it's really shiny," Soren said, ignoring Sigmar. "Look at it twinkle... I wonder if I could get to it?"

"Wait!" Sigmar shouted as Soren began to climb, clambering up tables and bookshelves to get to the chandelier. "It might drop at any moment!"

With that, the chandelier plummeted, falling right past Soren and landing at Sigmar's feet. It shattered, sending shards of glass everywhere.

"See?" Sigmar instructed Soren sternly as he climbed down. "We both could have gotten badly hurt!"

"Wow!" Soren exclaimed. "It's even pretty when it's broken!"

Sigmar sighed, and together they continued on.

Soon they came to a tunnel, seemingly through solid rock. The far door was made of rusty iron. "I wonder why this is here?" Sigmar wondered.

"Maybe this whole place is a pirate stronghold!" Soren suggested. "This is the entrance to their underground docks - locked so that if you open it without the proper handshake, it'll explode!"

"Oh, silly Soren," Sigmar sighed as he turned the doorknob. "That's impossible!"

Then the roof fell on them! Everyone died.

The end!