BUS BUS BUS

ALRIGHT BUS TIME

(It's time to get on the bus!)

Everybody on?

All right, our first stop will be... point-counterpoint towne!

Now, we all know how popular the Kelsey is. There are signs for him everywhere. Everyone wants one. But they're very expensive! And, especially in the modern economic climate, that just won't do.

Now, the David is much more widely used. He's much cheaper, too! The trouble is, he's less loved. Hardly anyone likes the David - they may use him, but they don't really feel any affection for him as a result. He's just there! It is the perennial tragedy of the David.

So, honestly, why not just buy a David? They're cheaper, and, in the end, they do basically the same things. Plus, many Nikolases will only interact with Davids, as the result of the relatively small Kelsey-market

Counterpoint!

It's true that Kelseys are more expensive than Davids. Some compare this to a "Kelsey Tax" - rather a ridiculous term, but whatever. The key point here is that they're only looking at a small part of the picture when they say that! There are any number of advantages to using a Kelsey over a David.

First, Kelseys are notoriously more user-friendly. They just like people more! Partially, this is because they're more carefully overseen in production - when you know a Kelsey, you know you're buying quality - not like a lot of the shoddy, foreign-made Davids you see advertised. Another reason is that they're just safer. Hardly anyone wants to attack a Kelsey! It's just not worth it, when it's so much easier to pick on Davids. Unlike the increasingly paranoid Davids, the Kelseys can afford to be friendly!

countercounterpoint

If you really want security, when not get an Ethan? They're free, lightweight, and just as secure as a Kelsey, if not more so - and their repuation of user-unfriendliness is really quite exaggerated!

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If you love Ethans so much, why don't you marry them?

countercountercountercounterpoint

Yeah! David-loving pig!

Oh no! It appears that point-counterpoint towne has turned into brawl town! Well, I hope you've enjoyed your stay - because we're turning this bus around!

yaaaaaaaaaay