Sunday, February 10, 2008

The Sleeper

The Jagermonster turned to his companion. "How long haz he been like diz?" he asked.

"Oh, a few generations, give or take."

The Jagermonster did a double take. "Vot? Und he's still jusht here? He loooks fine."

"You'd hardly think it to look at him, would you? But he's been here longer than the walls, the floor, or the mechanical autonomous chain-gun defenses, even."

Leaning over the sleeper, the Jagermonster licked his lips. "He looks pritty tasty. Hyu tink he'd mind if Hy took a leedle bite?"

"The defenses here were set up to protect him." Somewhat menacingly: "If you so much as touch a hair on his head, you will be full of more holes than a sponge."

"All right, all right! No need to gets snippy," the Jagermonster said, standing upright. "Zo vot do hyu vant de leedle guy for, anyvay?"

"We want to figure out how to make him stop sleeping." Enthusiastically: "If we could, it would have untold value - people in comas, maybe the terminally withdrawn - they could all be safely be brought back to life!"

"And hyu could maybe be putting pipple to diz sleep," the Jagermonster suggested cannily.


"I vill not be helpink hyu wit diz," the Jagermonster declared, taking a moral stand. "Iz not right."

"You eat people!" the disembodied voice complained.

There was a long pause as the Jagermonster processed this.

"So?" he asked. "Vot's vrong vit dot?"

There was nothing more to be said.

The sleeper continued his slumber.

(due credit)