Full Chronicles of Desmond movie - OFFICIAL EDITION

The full script follows. After repeated editing, this is now OFFICIAL hooray!

1a. Setting: a darkened room. Characters: Person in bed (covered up, seen briefly), standing man.

MAN: [taking bundle from person in bed] I will name him: Desmond!
NARRATOR: And he wasse deade.
(Credits, if absolutely necessary, go here.)

b. Animated sequence. Slides: A drawing of child Desmond (~6), looking youthful, in Isselunde. A drawing of child Desmond (~12), brandishing a stick, in Isselunde; child Matthew (~13) can be seen in the background, holding "elf dung".
NARRATOR: Desmond grew swiftly, full of strength and vitality from a young age.
NARRATOR: He dreamed of martial pursuits, slaying imaginary dragons and occasionally riding the "Magic Dragon King" with his childhood friend, Matthias. Desmond longed for adventure...

c. Setting: A church. (?) Characters; Desmond, Matthias.
DESMOND: (mumbling something prayer-related, kneeling before an altar)
MATTHIAS: (approaching DESMOND, whispering) Desmond! Friend! I have a secret to share!
DESMOND: (lifting his head) Yes...
MATTHIAS: (whispering, excited) Have you heard of the sword Durendal?
DESMOND: The blade wielded by Charlemagne's knights?
MATTHIAS: Yea, I didde hear that the Archbishop Turpin, who did grant it to Charlemagne's knights, is here in Isselunde; with Durendal!
DESMOND: Come, friend, let's seek it! I am a noble enough lad, yes?
MATTHIAS: (looks doubtingly)
DESMOND: Come now! Yea, at the least we shall have seen the legend, and at best: glory!
DESMOND and MATTHIAS leave together.

d. Setting: A sunlit glade. (Wilson Park?) Characters: Desmond (holding large stick), Matthias (holding something holy), the Archbishop Turpin. Extras: Vile Pink Ooze (two people under a large pink blanket)
DESMOND: [Walking into glade] Yea, O noble archbishop Turpin, holder of the sacred blade Durendal, will you grant it unto me, that I may act as a hero ought?
TURPIN: Of course, my child.
OOZE: [eats Turpin]
DESMOND: [picking a stick from the ground] Monstrosity! You will pay for this atrocity!
MATTHIAS: [in background] God is with you in this!

OOZE: [Oozes towards Desmond]
DESMOND: [Dances around ooze, fake-whacking it with stick] Fall, beast! Die! Die! Die! I will be your end! Aah! Die!
OOZE: [Collapses]
DESMOND: [Draws DURENDAL from under ooze, holding it up in the air (as Link)] Victory!
[Optional sound effect here]

e. Setting: Outside of house. (Mine?) Characters: King Kessler (deposed), Desmond (with Durendal).
DESMOND: [Walking up] Who are you, fine and noble-looking sir, and what do you here, before my own father's house?
KESSLER: I have heard of your noble deeds - [looking at Durendal] even now, that sword at your hip gives testimony to your bravery. I have come to deliver you a quest.
DESMOND: A quest?
KESSLER: Yes. You must defeat... the RATTE-KINGE GALGAMOTH!

END OF ACT 1

2a. Setting: A darkened room. Characters: The Ratte-Kinge (a doll/infant)

NARRATOR: The Ratte-Kinge GALGAMOTH was borne, and he didde eat his own dung.

b. Animated sequence. Slides: A child Ratte-Kinge (~6), studying at a desk in a classroom; mollusks may be seen in the background. A child ratte-kinge (~12), kneeling before the Timmaraque-Angel; mathematical equations hover about his head in a halo. The Ratte-Kinge as a merchant (~20?), standing in brightly-coloured garb.
NARRATOR: Galgamoth was ever interested in learning, despite the poverty into which he was born.
NARRATOR: For his dedication to learning and the Church, an Angel of the Timmaraque appeared to Galgamoth, blessing him with knowledge of the vectors.Thus, Galgamoth renamed himself Nikolauss.
NARRATOR: Despite the complexity of the mathematics, Nikolaus applied himself and became a successful merchant; gaining wealth... power... and the lust for more.

d. Setting: A throne room. Characters: King Kessler, the Ratte-Kinge (as merchant?). Extras: Two Ratte-Soldiers.
RATTE-KINGE: [striding in, with ratte-soldiers at his side] My mercenary army, which I hired with my money, has conquered peaceful ISSELUNDE. Kneel to me, "King" Kessler!
KING KESSLER: [beaten, weary, standing up (from throne)] You may have won the battle... but I will never kneel to you. I am the rightful king. I will regain my throne!
RATTE-KINGE: [triumphant] Hah! You are pitiful. My power and money will give me control over ISSELUNDE for all of time. I declare you exiled; nevermore shall you set foot in your beloved REYKJAKVIK. And [sitting in throne] I declare myself king!
KING KESSLER: [being dragged away by guards] I will return and overthrow you, you Timmaraque-damned Rat-King!

e. Setting: The throne room, later. Characters: the Ratte-Kinge. Extras: A ratte-soldier, two common citizens.
CITIZEN 1: [pleading before throne] Please! I swear I meant no harm to the royal chariot!
RATTE-KINGE: [imperious] Take him away! [in stage whisper] Ruling ISSELUNDE seemed sweet before, but now... I worry that the least of things now weary and anger me. [shouting] Next!
CITIZEN 2: I bring you a gift, your majesty, from the people of REYKJAKVIK.
RATTE-KINGE: [taking gift] What's this? Grass jelly?
CITIZEN 2: The finest food in all of REYKJAKVIK.
RATTE-KINGE: [incredulous] Grass jelly? [beat] Bah! [tossing grass jelly to the floor] What is Isselunde? A miserable little pile of grass jelly!
CITIZEN 2: ...your majesty?
RATTE-KINGE: ISSELUNDE is no proper land for a king! Rat-King KESSLER named me, and so shall I be. Let the tyranny begin! [gesturing to guard] Take him away!
CITIZEN 2: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
3a. As 1d.
DESMOND: [cont. from act 1] I am to slay the RATTE-KINGE GALGAMOTH?
KING KESSLER: Yea. It was he who stole the throne of Isselund, to which I rightfully ascended. He oppresses the peaceful people of Isselunde. He must be overthrown!
DESMOND: I will do it! But where am I to find this Ratte-Kinge?
KING KESSLER: In his tyranny, he journeys all across Isselunde. They say that he can be found now in the nearby town of Twinleaf.
DESMOND: [bowing, leaving] I will slay the Rat-King, in Timmeraque's name!

b. Setting: The Twinleaf Ford (the bridge at Creekside). Characters: Desmond (with DURENDAL), the Ratte-Kinge. Extras: A ratte-soldier.
DESMOND: [striding onto the bridge] Yea, the people are crying out for salvation, RATTE-KINGE! DURENDAL shall be your end!
RATTE-KINGE: [whirling about] What? Who are you? Yea, let my guard slay thee!
RATTE-SOLDIER: [charging] Yah!
DESMOND: [drawing DURENDAL and 'skewering' the soldier] Yea, the blade of Charlemagne disdains such foes. Have at thee!
RATTE-KINGE, DESMOND: [together, charging] For Timmaraque!
The two exchange blows in a heated melee.
DESMOND seems to gain the upper hand.
Suddenly, there is the sound of hoofbeats.
DESMOND: What? The ratte-cavalry! [stepping back, looking past the camera] There are dozens of them!
RATTE-KINGE: [laughing maniacally as DESMOND flees] ISSELUNDE shall be mine... forever!

c. as 1d.
DESMOND: [somewhat disheveled] Yea, though DURENDAL isse a strong blade, it may not prevail against the might of the RATTE-KINGE's army. How then may I slay this GALGAMOTH?
KESSLER: Though I didde not wishe it, the time has come. Yea, so that the RATTE-KINGE's army may be defeated, I muste wage revolution, relying on the people of ISSELUNDE.
DESMOND: And what am I to do, as you plot insurrection?
KESSLER: Let you find us aid for our cause. It is said that in a church to the east, there is a man who may command the king of dragons. Let you enlist him unto our cause.
DESMOND: [bowing, leaving] Yea, it shall be done!
KESSLER: [as DESMOND leaves, to himself] Now, find me the men BRADSUSHI, FISCHERDUDE, ROLANDUS...

d. Setting: A church. [The mormon church?] Characters: Desmond (with Durendal), Matthias.
DESMOND: [entering] A-hoy-hoy! Matthias! It is you? I never thought to see you here!
MATTHIAS: A-hoy-hoy! Yea, it has been many a day since I last saw you!
DESMOND: Do you know of a man who may command the dragon-king? Yea, it is said that he does reside here, and he is sorely needed for the liberation of ISSELUNDE.
MATTHIAS: Why... I am he! I command the MAGIC DRAGON KING. But I fear he is of little use in times of war.
DESMOND: Alas! Then my mission here is in vain. [turning to the door] I must depart!
MATTHIAS: Wait! Yea, though you may not command the King of Dragons in battle, I yet have the skill of 'powering up' weapons and armour, granted by faith the Saint Timmeraque.
DESMOND: Yea, shall the RATTE-KINGE tremble!

e. as 1d, plus Matthias.
KESSLER: You return! Yea, the troops are mustered, and the revolution is ready. The RATTE-KINGE, having sniffed out my plans, now cowers in REYKJAVIK. You must hunt him down and destroy him!
MATTHIAS: DURENDAL is now empowered; yea, I now goe to assist the brave rebels.
DESMOND: [bowing and leaving, with Matthias] In Timmaraque's name, the tyrant shall fall at last!

f. Setting: The Throne Room. Characters: The Ratte-Kinge, Desmond (with Durendal). Extras: A Ratte-Soldier, a Rebel Soldier (one of those named in 3c?).
DESMOND: [entering, with rebel] Come out and fight me, cowardly Ratte-Kinge!
RATTE-SOLDIER: [lunges; exchanges two blows with rebel, and then slays him] Yah!
DESMOND: [slaying Ratte-Soldier with ease] Fight me! REYJAVIK is liberated! You are alone!
RATTE-KINGE: [disheveled, emerging from behind throne] What... what do you wish of me?
DESMOND: Yea, you have many names: RATTE-KINGE, GALGAMOTH, NIKOLAUS. More numerous are your tyrannies, perpetrated on innocent ISSELUNDE. You have robbed KING KESSLER of his rightful throne. Now, in the name of Saint Timmaraque, who you have betrayed with your villany, I shall slay thee!
RATTE-KINGE: [drawing himself up] Yea, I shall not die thus easily!
They duel cautiously, circling the throne. Each insults the other.
DESMOND's insults: dung-eater, coward, throne-thief, helle-ponde-spawn.
RATTE-KINGE's insults: regicide, desmosome, silly little man.
RATTE-KINGE: [falling to his knees, DURENDAL at his throat] I am not defeated. Yea, the angel TIMMARAQUE has promised it. I shall rule ISSELUNDE so long as I live-
The RATTE-KINGE crumples to the ground, the crown falling from his head.
DESMOND: [wiping Durendal clean and sheathing it] The angel TIMMARAQUE preserves those of virtue. This RATTE-KINGE was no smarter than a mollusk.

g. Setting: The throne room, later. Characters: Desmond (with Durendal), King Kessler (restored), Matthias. Extras: A Royal Guard.
King Kessler enters, followed by the guard. DESMOND and MATTHIAS bow.
DESMOND: Your majesty. The RATTE-KINGE is dead, and yea, there was much rejoicing.
KING KESSLER: Yea, I shall then resume my rightful throne.
MATTHIAS: [after KESSLER sits, lowering the crown onto KESSLER's head] By the grace of Saint Timmaraque and all of his mollusks, yea, I do proclaim ye once more the rightful king of all ISSELUNDE.
NARRATOR: Yea, and there much rejoicing, and all present did smoke of the elf-dung and fly on the magic dragon king.
NARRATOR: And it was goode.

[credits roll]