The Time I Hit On A Young Girl

I walked up to her, in the library. Something about her struck me - I'm not certain what it was. Her hair, perhaps. Her face. Whatever it was, it compelled me. So I wound up and struck her, a blow that sent her sprawling.

She lay there for a moment; then her face lit, furious. She stood, and then charged me, screaming shrilly. Surprised, I did not move out of the way in time, and was slammed into a bookshelf. Books fell as other patrons screamed and fled. She rammed me repeatedly, pummeling me with her fists. I could do little to protect myself, holding my arms in front of me ineffectually.

Then she paused, for just a moment; and I had my chance. I slipped out of the way and hit her from behind, knocking her into the same bookshelf I myself had so painfully encountered. She took it with more grace, though, bouncing off and slamming into me. I allowed myself to fall backwards, knocking over an indignant librarian. The girl flew over my head, and I took the opportunity to give her a further push. She went skidding along a table-top, and at its end did a hand-stand to bring herself back upright directly. We stood facing each-other, each weighing the odds of victory.

Then our battle was interrupted. A gigantic metal limb punched through the ceiling of the library with a cacophonous boom, destroying an old iMac. Another smashed through at the other end of the library, just barely missing me. We looked at each-other, and silently agreed to suspend the battle.

Each of us leapt onto one of the limbs, even as they began to lift upward, pulling ourself up it as one might a ladder. The girl was swifter than I, but I had a head start, and so we reached the top at nearly the same time. Some crew awaited us, armed but caught unprepared. We made short work of them, the girl preferring to punch them into submission while I simply tossed them off the walker. With most of the crew gone, I found the controls and, with a little twiddling, shut the mechanism down. I allowed myself a sigh of satisfaction; then the air was driven out of me by a blow to the solar plexus. Curled up into a ball, I realized that the truce was over.

I uncurled myself as soon as I could breathe again, knocking the girl over with a foot to the ankle. We fought a vicious little war of elbow and knee, guarding our vulnerable regions while looking for any opportunity to strike the other's and, of course, to get back to our feet. Sadly, I did not watch the edge of the walker, and so in a particularly swift sequence of blows found myself dangling from it, fifty meters off the ground. The girl laughed at me; too close! I snagged her, putting her in the same predicament, right next to each-other.

Our faces were less than an inch away.

She kicked me in the groin and I fell, agonized, to the ground. Prone, I heard the legs of the great walker come to life once more, and saw it march into the distance. I was in rather too much pain to appreciate it, mind you.

In the hospital, I considered. It was probably worth it, I thought, so long as she hasn't stuck me with the bill for damages.