Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Issun Dilemma

Across the world, Issuns were going extinct! Thousands, perishing! The entire species, in danger!

World leaders agreed: Something Must Be Done. They created a task force to tackle the problem, armed with the finest minds and most advanced equipment the globe had to offer. The task force was given the designation N-00135, and more: such was the importance of their mission that they were to be given supreme, unhindered power, to do everything humanly possible to save the Issuns from extinction.

N-00135 carefully considered the situation for two days, examinating everything currently known about the Issuns. Having looked at the available information, perused it carefully, and analyzed it thoroughly, they suggested to the nations of the world that they deserved a pay raise.

(The task force. Not the Issuns.)

This was accomplished.

Hooray! The day was saved!

Epilogue: N-00135 members went into a wealthy retirement. They seemed quite pleased with themselves.

World leaders continued to lead the world. The next crisis to attract their attentions involved a rare subspecies of lemur. The Marines were sent in! It was all very exciting, and got excellent ratings. So the world leaders got re-elected and everyone was happy.

The Issuns assembled into a strange, human-like colony-structure (like fungi) and wrote a series of bestselling books about evolutionary biology.


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