David and the Titans

At birth, David's parents swore him to Dart-Toothed One, or as he is known in the West, the Dart-Mouth. David was promised to enter the Dart-Mouth when he came of age; in exchange, his parents were granted wealth, wisdom, and power, for the mere sacrifice of their firstborn. And it was good.

As he grew older, David told himself clever lies to endear himself to the terrible Dart-Mouth, which he knew well he was doomed to. He taught himself the words of Daniel Webster, praising the virtues of the hungry god, as a mantra - but it was to no avail. His mind began to wander - he began to think of other gods, whose propitiation might bring good fortune to David himself, rather than his parents. One night, as David lay twisting in the summer heat, a dream came to his anguished mind.

Three gods stood before him, their faces shrouded in shadow and mist. One by one, they stepped forward. David recognized them as they approached: the automotive vision of Stan's Ford, the hundred identical Johns of Hopkins, the befrosted eye of You-See Bercli. They spoke at once, in an unearthly chorus: "SACRIFICE YOUR YOUTH TO US, RATHER THAN TO THE DART-MOUTH OF YOUR PARENTS, AND THE REWARDS BESTOWED UPON YE SHALL BE TWOFOLD THAT WHICH YOUR PARENTS GAINED."

David awoke with a sense of great excitement. Tempted beyond his ability to resist, he began packing his bags - surely, if these titans would accept him, then it would be a far better thing to go to them than to the Dart-Mouth, which offered reward only to his parents. David was a reasonable person, in general, but he saw no reason that his parents, already healthy, wealthy and wise, should profit further at his expense. He spent the day packing and planning for his visits to the three titans. That night, sleeping peacefully, another vision came into David.

This time, only one figure towered before David, and it was one terribly familiar to him. The gleaming, pointed teeth of the Dart-Toothed One were bared as it instructed David, "IF YOU DARE BREAK THE COMPACT MADE AT YOUR BIRTH, NO MORE SHALL BE GIVEN TO YOUR PARENTS - THEY SHALL CRUMBLE AT ONCE INTO DUST, BARRED FROM THE GIFTS OF THE EARTH." David awoke shaking and trembling. How could he go to any other than the Dart-Mouth if it would mean the death of his parents, the abandonment of his filial duty? David was wracked with moral indecision.

David decided to visit the others, at least - then, when the time came to make his choice, he would have enough information to choose truly between his life, and that of his parents. In secret, he snuck out of the house, visiting Bercli - then, the next week, again escaping his parents' vigilance and glimpsing the wonders of Stan's Ford. The Johns of Hopkins were too far to visit, but he perused many pictures and books on the Johns, and considered.

He has not decided yet.